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Your free,
personalised "notmensa
online IQ
test for dummies" results.
Thank you for taking
our I.Q. test. Shown below is a complete and accurate assessment of your
intelligence quotient and a complex analysis of your personality and
character.
Provided
your IQ meets our stringent entry requirements you will be offered free
lifetime membership of notmensa
and access to all the benefits and privileges
that this elitist interplanetary society provides. |
| |
| Score |
5.5 % |
| I.Q. |
-23
(Medically, this level of intelligence is referred
to as straw-head syndrome )
|
| Personality |
You share the same personality as many
root vegetables - though turnips are slightly more dynamic than you are.
Getting out of bed in the morning is your biggest challenge of the day. |
| Self Esteem |
As you do not understand the meaning
of self esteem it is obviously impossible for you to have any. |
| Emotional |
You tend to cry over trivia, like
romantic movies and overlook the important events such as major earthquakes,
war and famine. |
| Honesty |
You find it hard even to trust
yourself. In this assessment you are correct for you are so stupid that
you even steal from yourself. |
| Other Traits |
Tends to take dizzy turns whenever you
need to get out of bed.
Becomes bored unless doing something active, such
as pencil tapping or scratching body parts..
Has difficulty attracting members of the opposite
sex but a magnet for flies. |
| Disorders |
Suffers from habitual flatulence.
Overactive sex drive. Under active antiperspirant
applier.
|
| Career Suitability |
Astronaut
Bottle Cleaner
Undertaker |
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|
| notmensa
membership |
Well Done!!!
You are an ideal candidate for exclusive free
membership to notmensa.
Please go to the application page. |
Disclaimer:
Not Mensa do not undertake testing of any sort on monkeys, rabbits, dogs, cats
or any other animals with an I.Q. greater than that of our societies members.
This is not because we are an humane society – rather we just do not have the
skills to participate in cruel, pointless testing on clever creatures. We do
however reserve the right to partake of sweet and sour chicken on club nights
and to eat haggis, pork pies and sausage whenever we like. No member of Not
Mensa will ever be asked to undertake brain surgery to lower their intelligence
– however, any member who consistently scores more than 85 will be banned from
the society until they bring their intelligence under control. Should you be
stupid enough to join or email list we will not bombard you with emails or pass
on your details to any 2nd, 3rd, 4th or 5th
party. (Party includes hen nights, disco parties and stag nights) We do reserve
the right to email members information that may be of a totally boring and
pointless nature and may not make sense to even the author. We also reserve the
right to modify the rights without notifying members or actually writing these
modified rights on the membership handbook or this website. All email questions
regarding membership rights or any other matter will probably be ignored –
unless incredibly funny.
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The Little Book of
Stress :
Packed with practical
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